Can life become more complicated? As if being a newlywed weren’t enough of an adjustment, try doing it UNDEAD. Yep, as a new vampire, I’ve got my share of challenges. Growing up in sunny Florida, worshiping the blaring rays, I now am praying for overcast days. Sunscreen in 75 strength is my moisturizer. I just picked up a new pair of Chanel sunglasses (courtesy of my best friend, Meredith) with ultra UV protection, so my eyes are protected, and luckily, my office is windowless.
Oh, did I mention I’m a dentist? My long-time patients are remarking about how translucent my skin has become and how svelte I am. They have no idea the new me is courtesy of being undead. Yes, no more struggling with weight. As soon as my transformation to vampire was complete, I dropped those last 10 pounds I’d been struggling to shed. I was worried my husband (that would be John Wright, the vampire vigilante), would miss my love handles, but he’s still smitten.
Currently, my biggest challenge is a jealous vampire in London who was my husband’s first wife’s partner-in-crime. Amy’s been cropping up on a regular basis to threaten me, and John’s planning a visit to London to annihilate her and her nasty coven of teenage vampires. I shudder to think of the confrontation with that nasty female, but John assures me that he can handle her. Once she’s out of the picture, John promises we can start a family. Just in case you were wondering, vampires beget vampires. There’s something oddly comforting about that.
We’re just back from our honeymoon in Venice, where we assisted John’s friend Lucianno in breaking up a Mafia drug ring. I’d been looking forward to the excitement of hot and heavy vampire lovemaking, so I was a bit peeved with the Mafia’s intrusion. That said, it was good experience for me. I got to sharpen my fangs on some crime work, which I’ll be doing soon enough in Orlando. John still isn’t ready for me to join him on the streets of Central Florida, putting a bite on crime, but I’m learning the ropes. I can happily announce that I now can move at the speed of light and my peripheral vision is 360 degrees. Haven’t mastered the art of morphing to bat form, but I’ll keep you posted.
If you want to follow my antics, pick up Fang Shui, now available from DCL Publishing. And for the story of how John and I met, start with Love Fang, a current TOP 5 best-seller from DCL (www.thedarkcastlelords.com). Happy reading, and please don’t hesitate to offer your suggestions. I need all the help I can get.
Dr. Lauren Marsh Wright, DDS