Give me a kisses, and to that kisse a score;
Then to that twenty, adde a hundred more;
A thousand to that hundred; so kisse on,
To make that thousand up a million;
Treble that million, and when that is done,
Let’s kisse afresh, as when we first begun.
~Robert Herrick, “To Anthea (III)”
“No sooner met but they looked; no sooner looked but they loved; no sooner loved but they sighed; no sooner sighed but they asked one another the reason; no sooner knew the reason but they sought the remedy,” said William Shakespeare. Today we are looking out of weary eyes because the world is a dangerous place to live in. All around us we see the effects of what we feared as a nation. That war would come to us . Before we as humans can enjoy world peace we got to get a hold on how to cement our common every-day relationships with love, understanding and affection.
Most of us take kissing for granted. What is a kiss? A k
iss is a secret lip-to-mouth instead of ear. I think most of us think we need to be hard-wired to be a good kisser. After all, two heads are always better than one when it comes to kissing. Those few of us who know they are good kissers are all puffed up in arrogance and self-indulgence. Sometimes lovers forget kissing takes two pair of eager or at least consenting lips. Of course, there is also the French habit of kissing the hands of your beloved first; after all, we’ve got to start somewhere. Some think we have to practice to be perfect which might be true. I’ve found in my many years of kissing that no amount of practice can help a bad kisser. “Any man who can drive safely while kissing a pretty girl is simply not giving the kiss the attention it deserves, said Albert Einstein.
Perhaps talking about what we like first would enhance what we do later, as well as making sure we don’t have bad breath or exhibit bad manners beforehand. When we’re young, we might start out on fresh fruit like a peach, progressing to warm blood filled limbs of our best friends forearms, laughing all the time or lol, as the kids would say. Once we understand kissing sometimes takes practice, we can begin enjoying lip-to-lip interaction as an exciting new means to begin and end the day with. We all agree touch is the mother of the senses and kissing is a specialized form of intimate contact for all of us. Kisses performed in an affectionate manner add to our soul’s estate. They add to our self-esteem and our own vision of ourselves as being lovable and willing to cultivate lovers. A kiss is always a credit because it is always profitable when returned. I imagine we’re all better off locking our minds together in love rather than war. e.e. Cummings says, “kisses are a better fate than wisdom.”
But we all look forward to our first kiss and last kiss of the day. They can be romantic and terrifying at the same time depending on our maturity level. For many of us we imagine our first kiss as our first close encounter. No other but a kiss can bestow the gift of eternal youth for the elderly. As I’m in the winter of my years, I haven’t been partaking lately but that doesn’t mean we elders don’t still like to be kissed. In the case of a child kissing his best friend it comes natural. Children have yet to learn to barter their affections. Preteens and teenagers on the other hand first find kissing a means to an end. In the case of grandma kissing grandpa, most wimpy and quickly delivered pecks-on-the-cheek can still deliver a message of loyal affection, gratitude, compassion, sympathy, intense joy and at times even profound sorrow. Don’t forget we parents, grandparents and elderly find unsought kisses and hugs highly pleasurable and with profound gratitude. A popular proverb says A kiss without a hug is like a flower without the fragrance.
Some kisses demand too much in return. We have to be careful to weight the consequences of kissing when not in love. It is thought humans invented kissing. Most infants begin their oral fixation by suckling either their mom’s breasts or its replacement. We give our children candy on a stick, and our teenagers begin their journey by blowing kisses or holding hands. Kissing leads our children to maturity, the sad and lonely to the feeling of being wanted and needed, and we often kiss our elders goodbye, sending them to the angels. In Genesis, it is written that when Jacob died, “Joseph fell upon his father’s face and wept upon and kissed him.”
A kiss is not just a kiss. There are some amazing and surprising benefits of kissing. Yes, it definitely feels good, but there’s definitely proof that a kiss is not just a kiss. There are real wholesome and healthy benefits to kissing, and some of these might even surprise you.
You may think this is an odd subject for today when so many have been taking part in memorials all across the world due to 911. So many of us are using our kisses to say Hi and Goodbye to their loved ones killed on that fateful day. Even the act of kissing the Steele Cross that fell into the rubble is considered by most as a holy act of affection, respect and love for those departed. Unfortunately, a kiss is that thing for which the demand is higher than the supply for all of us. You might think of a kiss as the persecution for the child, ecstasy for the youth and homage for the old. An old Chinese Proverb says, “Kissing is like drinking salted water. You drink, and your thirst increases.” Democracy is like that. Once you experience freedom, your thirst increases not only for yourself but for others less fortunate. Kisses are like tears, the only real ones are the ones you can’t hold back. My prayers go to all of you in these grave times.
By Joyce White